Never Cry Werewolf

“Yea, a pedophile werewolf moved next door!”

SYNOPSIS: A new neighbor moves in next door. The next thing you know weird voices are being heard in the main character’s head. Loren then notices the new neighbor Jared doing weird things like bringing people home and never seeing them again!

THOUGHTS: Why the hell can no one make a werewolf movie that does the creature justice?! Oh and why the hell would the lead be a HIGH SCHOOL girl? This is just a formula for trouble! Lets take a thirty something year old guy and pair him with a seventeen-year-old girl. Ok so maybe she “looks like his old love”, why wouldn’t she? Hey you know what? Why don’t you drive her brother to school so you can gawk at her in front of people that might find the situation suspicious. You know what else, lets make sure she’s watching when we bring hookers home to feast. Oh, better yet, lets throw Kevin Sorbo in there for no reason except to have him not save anything and just look like a buffoon. This movie wasn’t too big a disappointment, I guess because I never expect a lot from werewolf movies because like I said before they haven’t made any really good ones. So from that statement I guess this wasn’t the worst movie ever. Yes there is plenty wrong with it but it’s a werewolf movie. So if you’re like me you’ll keep dreaming they will make one that is worthy of the creature but until then good luck.

STARS: *

Reviewed by

Howlin’ Dave

They Live

“Classic Carpenter movie!”

SYNOPSIS: Life is normal until a down and out man finds a special pair sunglasses! These special glasses allow him to see the alien nation that has integrated with us unnoticed. So this man decides to join the resistance fighters. This man is no other than Rowdy Roddy Piper!!!!

THOUGHTS: Where do I begin? The movie Trey Parker copied frame to frame for the epic cripple fight or wonderfully taken lines like “It’s time to kiss ass or chew bubble gum, and I’m all outta gum!” This is a classic John Carpenter movie like I said which means it also has his music! I love his music because it reminds you that it’s an old movie. It sounds like a Casio, but the tune is very catchy!

This movie also brings me back to a better time, when Rowdy Roddy ruled the world of movies! When he left wrestling I was sad and had no outlet. Then I saw him in a bunch of movies, not very good movies, buy movies nonetheless!

Now a day I compare this movie to the Marvel Secret Invasion! I think these guys are actually more ugly! Well only with two super heroes. I forgot about Pipers partner, Goliath from Disney’s Gargoyles.

STARS: ***

Reviewed by

Howlin’ Dave

MIRRORS

What happens when Jack Bauer meets a dark presences”

SYNOPSIS: A man tries to fix his life and reunite with his kids after he messes up his life. He was a cop and messed up. He is a drunk and can’t really get a job anywhere. He gets hired at an old abandoned burned down building. Some weird things start happening and there you have it.

THOUGHTS: I really enjoyed this movie. I, of course, admire Kieffer Sutherland as an actor. It goes way back to his vampire days and before. This movie had a bunch of creepy shots and some nice horror elements, plus I’m somewhat suspicious of mirrors. I thought it wasn’t really an original idea but it was done rather nicely. Plus Amy Smart is not hard to look at either.

There was an aspect that they didn’t roll with for a long. They had some really horrifying visuals inside the building but they left from this quickly. I also didn’t like the villainous presence. I think it was a valiant effort, it was very original but it didn’t work for me.

The ending was amazing though. It also wasn’t super original but I hadn’t expected them to have the balls to do it. So I did like ‘Jack Bauer vs The Dark Presence’.

Reviewed by

Howlin’ Dave

Funny Games

“Games that aren’t so Funny.”



SYNOPSIS: A family goes to their house on the lake for a vacation. The next thing they know they are two guys show up with a lot of pleasantries and odd conversation. The family is then tortured and forced into stressful (to say the least) decisions.



(SPOILERS IN MY THOUGHTS!!!!)

THOUGHTS: Unimpressed. I really like the concept and the way some things played out. I really like the cast too, Naomi Watts and Tim Roth! They are both very good actors and have some very good scenes so I guess I could see why they chose the movie. There was just a very stupid element, when the good guys get a chance to fight back (by blowing one of the two bad guys away with a shotgun, probably the best part of the movie!) they are knocked down a peg when the bad guy TAKES OUT A REMOTE AND REWINDS TIME!!!!!!!!! Really?! This movie had some very good scenes that were very tense and creepy. Even a game of hot and cold to find the body of their dead dog!

I do not recommend this movie for anyone who likes a nice tense movie, I mean yes it does the trick, but there is no plot, no resolution, and the reality is taken away in just one moment. The bad guy talking to the camera ruins the tension of the movie a little bit before the remote time. So overall, I can’t believe I’m saying this, I would not recommend this movie. I think they messed this movie up and should just un make this version of it.





STARS:




Reviewed by
Howlin’ Dave

Saw

The first in the series of movies that tells the tale of the Jigsaw killer.



This is a very one of a kind movie. It has a great mixture of a great story along with tons of gore. It really has you guessing to the very end. even if you think you have it figured out they throw you a couple of nice curves to keep you guessing. I really can't say much more about it with out giving away some spoilers for those of you that didn't see this movie( and for those of you that did I think you can all agree with me on that one). But if this is one film that you didn't see I really suggest that you do see this film along with the others so your in time for Saw V later this month. You won't be disappointed that you did trust me.


Stars ****

- Dr. Blood

Supernatural

The series tells the tale of two brothers Dean and Sam on the search for their father and the search for what killed their mother when they were young. Along the way encountering and hunting down supernatural adversaries .

Just watched the first season and I have to say I usually just would post movie reviews up here but this show has warranted me posting a review about it up here. It's great. I'm really enjoying it. You really get a feel for the characters involved in the series. They did such a wonderful job developing them. As well as they do a great job of not letting the series fall at a slow pace like some series out there. This one doesn't really give the time for it to slow down. You will all ways have a new twist and turn to it to keep the story fresh and interesting. The supernatural adversaries that they encounter some are really kick ass but others are a little dull. But all the episodes are enjoyable. So if you want something that will hook you in till the very end of the season you will want to check this one out. You wont be disappointed.

stars ****


Dr.Blood

Drive Thru

A fast food icon is killing off teens.



Great for a watch. An enjoyable teen horror flick with a nice little twist in it, although it seemed a bit rushed to fit in the film. A couple of the one liners were just pure Cheese but thats to be expected when the name of the killer fast food clown is named "Horny". The flick does have a decent gore factor to it with a couple of nice gory scenes. also look for an appearance from Morgan Spurlock ( Super Size Me) as the burger joint's manager (which I did have to chuckle at having seen Super Size Me. Any one who else saw that movie can see the humor in it as well). Overall not a bad film if your looking for a movie with some gore or even a flick to kick back and enjoy Drive Thru just might be what your looking for.

Stars ***

Dr.Blood

Special Dead

“The picture alone made me want to see this movie!”

Synopsis: The campers at a special needs camp along with the counselors are terrorized by zombies and fun ensues!

Thoughts: I had no idea this movie existed until Dr. Blood brought it to my attention. The next moment I knew I had to dedicate an hour and a half of my life to this movie. When it started I thought it was going to be cheese mania. I was actually pretty shocked; well I was shocked there was a sex scene so early into it, about the fact that it wasn’t taking itself very seriously. There were cool characters and well, they were very funny. The main character (or hero) was kinda douchey but it was so fitting, I don’t remember him taking his sunglasses off once.

The movie is easy to follow because the story isn’t something new, but the characters are very different then most people are used to. I just think I was also thrown off because they don’t do the normal cliché stuff, all the time. I think it has some redeeming qualities for naming itself after special needs people being attacked by zombies.

Stars: *** ½

Reviewed by

Howlin’ Dave

Chainsaw Sally

After her and her brother witness their parents being murdered Sally becomes a serial killer.

I really enjoyed this film more than I thought I would it really caught me off guard. The story isn't really one of those complex ones that require much thought which leaves room for brutal bloody fun. Some of the acting is not that bad and the camera in which the movie was shot is a real acquired taste but if you can look past that you might enjoy this film. Horror fans can really enjoy the few on screen references to Texas Chainsaw Massacre ( with a guest appearance from Gunnar Hansen (Leatherface)) and a few other horror films. Overall If you aren't a fan of the low budget kind of horror flicks you might have a hard time getting into this one, but it truly is worth at least a shot you might end up enjoying this one your self I know I did.


**1/2

- Dr.blood

Evil Dead

“The Beginning of HORROR in my life.”

SYNOPSIS: “5 college students on their way to an old abandoned cabin in the woods, oh yeah!” When they get to the cabin they wake a demon long dormant from reading the Necrinomicon aloud. Coming up from the ground the angry demon starts possessing everyone except for a lone boy who has to transform into a hero.

THOUGHTS: Where do I begin? A bunch of eighteen-year old kids want to terrify people by making a movie, well I think they were mainly scratching an itch they had for the longest time. They were making super-eight movies when they were young and felt they needed to expand their audience. This movie is spectacular because of the amount of heart, sweat, lack of sleep, and actual blood that went into this movie. They replaced actors, places, sets, and they made sure the car was in the movie. (Which will appear in many other movies as a trademark).

The Raimi’s and Bruce Campbell all became cult movie icons from this project alone. This movie has spawned two sequels, hundreds of t-shirts, influences in movies, millions of deadites, and even a MUSICAL!!!(I have seen the musical twice, in the blood splattering section. All I can say is the musical might be just as good if not better because there are catchy songs you will sing for weeks. This I can discuss in great length another time and place.)

Speaking from a guy who loves movies, classic horror, gore, friend dismembering, blood everywhere, pencils used as weapons, chainsaws, boomsticks, and the feel of being scared by the demented thoughts of others, this movie is the best.

STARS: ****

Reviewed by

Howlin’ Dave

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